How to Handle Stress 1. Use your MasterCard to pay off your Visa. 2. Pop some popcorn without putting the lid on. 3. When someone says "Have a nice day," tell them you already have plans. 4. Find out what a frog in a blender really looks like. 5. Forget the Diet Center and send yourself a Candygram. 6. Make a list of things to do that you have already done. 7. Dance naked in front of your pets. 8. Put your toddler's clothes on backwards and send him off to pre-school as if nothing were wrong. 9. Retaliate for tax woes by filling out your tax forms in Roman numerals. 10. Tatoo "Out to Lunch" on your forehead. 11. Tape pictures of your boss on watermelons and launch them from high places. 12. Leaf through National Geographic and draw underwear on the natives. 13. Go shopping. Buy something. Sweat in it. Return it the next day. 14. Buy a subscription to Sleazoid Weekly and send it to your boss' wife. 15. Pay your electric bill in pennies. 16. Drive to work in reverse. 17. Relax by mentally reflecting on your favorite episode of "The Flintstones" during that important finance meeting. 18. Sit naked on a shelled hard boiled egg. 19. Refresh yourself. Put your tongue on a cold steel guardrail. 20. Polish your car with earwax. 21. Read the dictionary upsidedown and look for secret messages. 22. Start a nasty rumor and see if you recognize it when it comes back to you. 23. Bill your doctor for time spent in his waiting room. 24. Braid the hairs in each nostril. 25. Write a short story using alphabet soup. 26. Lie on your back eating celery... using your navel as a salt dipper. 27. Stare at people through the tines of a fork and pretend they are in jail. 28. Make up a language and ask people for directions.
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